How many are you able to check off?
- You ask other foreigners what kanji they chose for their 「はんこ」(“hanko”/stamp seal).
- You think you should call the electrician to change a light bulb, as your forgot how to do.
- You can’t stop saying 「寒い、寒い」”samui, samui” (cold, cold) to yourself when it’s a bit cold, and 「暑い、暑い」”atsui, atsui” (hot, hot) when it’s slightly too hot.
- You start saying “eeeh” and “oooh” in front of the TV, just to do like everybody else does.
- You realise you need foot massage and hot baths in winter because it’s colder inside your house than outside.
- You stare at gaijin, or foreigners/tourists (though you never call them that anymore), in public.
- Most of your photos have you doing the “V/Peace sign”.
- You don’t feel uncomfortable buying a pack of gum with a 10,000 Yen note(70€/100$).
- You are worried because the 「桜」”sakura” (cherry blossoms) are late.
- You watch Chinese or Korean movies relying on the Japanese subtitles or dub.
- You think it’s alright to stick your head into a stranger’s apartment, if the door is open, to see if anybody’s home.
- When in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by rice fields, aren’t surprised to find a random vending machine with no visible means of a power supply…
- You think nothing of it when said sole vending machine says “thank you” after you buy a drink.
- You stand before a sign on a bridge and ponder the possible meanings of “Bridge Freezes Before Road.”
- Engrish isn’t as funny as it used to be.
- You spend time trying to figure out what an Engrish word actually means.
- You’ve spent the night at a Manga café or Karaoke bar after missing the last train. More than once.
- You get a 「日本語が上手」”Nihongo ga jozu ([Your] Japanese is good.)” and feel as if you’re being insulted or patronised.
- On a cold autumn or winter night, the only thing you want for dinner is 「なべ」”nabe” and 「日本酒」”nihonshu”.
- When you think that coffee goes perfectly well with squid pizza.
- You think cod roe spaghetti with chilled red wine is a typical Italian dish.
- 「懐かしい」”natsukashii (literally, ‘nostalgic’)” comes out of your mouth instead of “what you’re saying makes me so nostalgic (And gazing off into the distance)….”
- You no longer pay any attention to what anyone does when you sit down beside them on a train.
Let the arse move away from the ‘gaijin’ if he wants to. - All of your December Sundays is reserved for 「ぼ年会」Bonenkai (end of year drinking party) hangover recovery.
- You start to get nervous/uncomfortable when there are too many gaijin in a bar.
- You’ve started to reserve seats with your wallet / bag. You don’t have the slightest worry that it might be stolen.
- You can’t read a book in public that doesn’t have a book cover.
- You’re starting to believe that romaji is English
- You ask people to “teach” you their phone number.
- It no longer bothers you that OIOI is pronounced marui.
- You’ve become extremely nostalgic about sakura.
- You regularly sleep at school or work.
- You remember important dates by the 「平成」 heisei or 「書わ」showa year.
- You use a taxi in your home country and you wait for the door to open automatically.
- You have accidentally apologized in Japanese in your home country.
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